


I think something's wrong with my heart

by thisisarandomuser



Series: Broadchurch Fics [2]
Category: Broadchurch
Genre: Alec Hardy Needs A Hug, Alec Hardy and His Broken Heart, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Pre-Canon, Pre-Season/Series 01
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-24
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-27 12:35:34
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20760461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thisisarandomuser/pseuds/thisisarandomuser
Summary: Alec has a nightmare. Tess does her best to comfort him. Alec tells her something important.





	I think something's wrong with my heart

**Author's Note:**

> So, I was motivated. And I like exploring the relationship between Tess and Alec. Also, Alec deserves all the hugs. So here we go.
> 
> Writing advice very much appreciated ✌

Tess was used to waking up and seeing the other side of the bed empty. It was quite normal. Alec worked a lot these days, came home late, got up early, and while she did understand it, with the burden of an unsolved double murder, one of the victims still a child, on his shoulders, she still missed him. 

Last night, Tess had been able to convince to come home with her, take a break, get some sleep. They'd fallen asleep together, both in their respective spaces (Alec was a restless sleeper and she tended to sprawl out on the bed like an eagle, so they didn't want to get in each other's way and to be honest, their relationship hadn't been going all that well, anyway. It had been months since they last shagged and the worst thing was that Alec didn't even seem bothered by it, like, at all) and Tess had hoped that they would both sleep through the night. Unfortunately that wasn't the case. She'd just woken up, the room still dark around her except for the red glowing numbers of his digital alarm clock. It read 03:47 am, even for Alec an unusual time to be out of bed. His blanket was scrunched up at the foot end of the bed. No sign of him. 

Tess sighed. Her eyelids still heavy with sleep, she got up to search for him. She knew she wouldn't be able to go back to sleep unless she found him. It didn't bother her all that much in the mornings anymore, but right now she was pretty damn worried. The last time she'd woken up in the middle of the night without him by her side hadn't been good news and she sure as hell didn't want to repeat it. Her feet carried her into the hall way and to Daisy's room. She was asleep, luckily, but no Alec here. Tess pressed a kiss to her daughter's forehead before leaving her room again. Daisy'd soon be old enough for hugs and kisses from her parents to be an embarrassment, and honestly, having a child murdered in the very town they lived definitely did its part to sometimes turn Tess's parental instincts of protecting her child into paranoia. She knew that Alec felt the same. He just dealt differently with it. 

After checking the bathroom, the last room upstairs, as well, Tess walked downstairs. There was light coming from the slit underneath the door to kitchen and when Tess opened it, she found Alec sitting on one of the chairs in his wrinkled grey sleep shirt and blue pyjama trousers, a glass of water clasped so tightly in his hand that his knuckles turned white. His eyes were red, his hair sweaty and disheveled, tears glimmering on his cheeks. He'd been crying. 

'Alec?'

He turned to focus his dark eyes on Tess, smiled. Tess noticed the bag under his eyes, noticed that his face wasn't as clean shaven as it used be just three weeks ago, before this case had started. He was stressed out. Shaving was always the first thing he stopped doing when he was under immense stress for a longer period of time.

'Aye.'

'Why are you up?'

'Nightmare.'

'Love, I'm sorry.'

He shrugged. She went over to him, sat down in his lap, wrapped one arm around his shoulders. Felt him rest his forehead against her neck. His chest rose and fell in a steady rhythm and she could feel his breath evening out against her skin. Quite naturally, her hand found its way into his hair and combed it in a soothing manner.

'Tess?'

'Yeah?'

'I think something's wrong with my heart.'

The shaky words made Tess freeze. She forced herself to relax.

'What do you mean?'

'When I woke up,' he paused, swallowed, ' when I woke up from the nightmare I felt like my whole chest was pounding and I could feel my heart jumping and I had this sharp pain in the left side of my chest and I felt like I couldn't breathe and like I would pass out any second again.'

Tess kept carding her fingers through Alec's hair. This didn't sound good. Absolutely not.

'Are you sure?,' she asked finally, 'I mean it could have been a panic attack from the nightmare, couldn't it?'

Alec had told her about the panic attacks he used to have as teenager years ago. Bit odd, yes, but not entirely unlikely that they'd come back. Especially not with the case. And with finding the little girl in the river. He swallowed again, shook his head.

'I know what a panic attack feels like. Similar. But not like this.' He looked up, took a sip of his water before burying his face at her neck again. 

'Has this happened before?'

'Third time this week.'

'Bloody hell, Alec! If it's this bad you should really get it checked over by a doctor.'

'I know. I just-'

He stopped in the middle of the sentence. She smiled sadly, finished it for him, her voice as gentle as possible.

'Hate doctors and hospitals. I know.'

Silence filled the room. It was weird to have Alec this close to her for the first time in weeks, but it was comforting, somehow. Reminded her of better times when their relationship hadn't been going to shit and when they were still so in love, butterflies in their stomachs, when they'd spent nights on the sofa, entangled with each other. They'd fit so naturally in each other's arms. The first time it had happened, Tess had barely been able to believe it. How could this man in her arms be the same as the rough constable from the station? But then again, Alec had surprised her often enough. Surprised her with how much he actually cared underneath his rough unapproachable appearance, showed her how vulnerable and emotional and even broken he was. His appearance was more a facade than anything else, his rude behaviour a cover for his awkwardness, his distance a self-protection from getting too attached. 

Tess gave in to a sudden urge and pressed a kiss to the wild mop of Alec's hair. 

'Alec?'

'Yes, love?'

'Tell me what happened in your nightmare?'

Alec didn't lift his head when he finally answered.

'I was back in the forest. Saw a body in the water and jumped in. It wasn't Pippa, though, it was Daisy. I couldn't save her. Couldn't get out of the water myself either. I drowned. And then I woke up not being able to breathe.' 

'Fuck. That's - that's just horrible.'

Alec nodded. 

'After I caught my breath I got up to check on Daisy and then came here.'

'Do you think you'll be able to sleep again? '

'Don't know.'

'You could really use the rest, you know?'

He nodded again. Tess searched for his hand, found it, squeezed it.

'I'm sorry that I'm working so much right now. But we need to find this guy.'

'I know, love. I know. I just miss you.'

It was true. She was missing him and the past fifteen minutes spent holding each other had shown her that more clearly than ever again. She'd believed that their relationship was beyond repair, but maybe she had been wrong. Maybe they could fix this, fix this more than just in the 'We're staying together for our daughter' sort of way. In the 'We're still madly in love' sort of way. That would be nice. Actually, it would be much more than nice but Tess was too tired to think of a better word right now.

He looked up, kissed her cheek.

'I miss you, too, Tess. A lot.'

Tess smiled at him, pushed a strand of hair behind his ear. He never let it get this unkempt during the day, but she wished he would. She rather liked it.

'C'mon, we'll get you into bed where your tired ass belongs.'

'I'm pretty sure my ass isn't more tired than the rest of me.'

She laughed, leant forward to peck his lips.

'Did Alec Hardy just make a joke? Too bad that no one but me was here to witness that.'

He laughed as well and both grinning, they got up to make their way upstairs again.

As soon as they were in their bedroom (after checking on Daisy once again, to soothe Alec who was still very shaken from his nightmare even if he wouldn't admit it), Tess could tell that Alec was tensing up again. His eyes were darting across the room as if expecting to see an intruder, he bit his lips until they were bleeding. She tried to ignore it as much as possible, gently maneuvered him into bed and lay down next to him. She opened her arms and waited for him to crawl towards her, curl up next to her, and then embraced him as tightly as she comfortably could, his head tucked safely underneath her chin. 

It was the first time in four months that they slept in each other's arms. 

Neither of them could know that it would also be the last time.


End file.
